| Posted by stmirren On Wednesday 18 July 2007 Quote |
Oh well I didnt make contact Jenny thankyou for the Fnf feature in response ( I think for a mention in the mag I requested for non res) FnF have one realy excellent feature run by a person called "Sue" called parenting classes for restricted dads. That is their best outlook sadly it wasnt promoted in your feature article. For me now its about any parent restricted by law and the social norms of divorce making contact with each other, called networking by the way gents, and making a real go of family with what they have. To that I had hoped for a response. Have to say too we have to fight for the presumption of shared parenting at the start of course. For the magazine to have credibility for me that issue has to be faced but what do others think? Now heres a challenge Jenny: Can you contact FnF and invite "sue" ( I dont give her last name in case she wont accept) to write a feature for your magazine. They will know who she is in that context. If she accepts it might be surprising for your readers. Have to say I'm thinking of giving up on mine. Every other weekend only, coupled with crippling CSA payments are proving too much without some support somewhere to improve on that. Dont know how I am going to explain that to them. Again I wish the magazine could show the viewpoint of the "other" parent so disadvantaged. Surely is not the case that shared parenting would be the best option however that can be done. Not just visiting ? Rather be a real parent myself and celebrate in your magazine the life style of shared parenting. But if it must be single parent then it must be far greater than every other weekend. love to all Phil |
| Posted by lynn1505 On Tuesday 24 July 2007 Quote |
Whatever you do don't give up. Quite a number of years ago when I split up from my first husband my children came to live with me. Visits were very flexible and the children's father had the children every weekend if he wanted them. Unfortunately, whilst I was going to great pains to tell the children nothing detrimental to their father, the same was not reciprocated, and my eldest son started to believe the stories his father (and grandmother) were telling and at the age of about 10 he went to live with his father. I allowed this thinking that eventually he would realise the truth and come back. I was also assuming that visiting him would be as flexible as I had allowed it in the first place. This was not to be. Although my other two sons continued to visit their father whenever they liked, barriers were put into place for me to see my son. I was not allowed to take him away from the house, I was not allowed in the house. We tried mediation and although my ex was in full agreement whilst we were in conference, he would go back to his old ways as soon as we were out. I gave up. It is my biggest regret. My son is now in his 20's and still refuses to see me and I think that is partly because I gave up. My other 2 sons are fine and still maintain a relationship with their father and brother. My present situation is that my second husband and father of my 2 daughters has committed crimes against children and consequently has forfeited all rights to be a father. If you love your children let them know, that may be only once a fortnight but they will still know. Never give up. Lynn |
| Posted by jennyshelley On Friday 27 July 2007 Quote |
Phil, I have taken on board your request and will apply myself to ensuring that we cover the areas of difficulty that you mention. I appreciate how hard it must be to be in your position. As Lynn said, DON"T give up! Lynn, my heart goes out to you. Jenny |
| Posted by stmirren On Sunday 29 July 2007 Quote |
hello lynn thankyou for your reply. Would love to say hello personally. my email is philp.neale@tiscali.co.uk My daughter mirren (12) is here now. I have no other family to advise or support. kind regards Phil. |
| Posted by vivian2007 On Tuesday 14 August 2007 Quote |
I am a single father, 34, from FL. I have a 9-year-old kid. I love her very much. Last year, I was recommended to www.wealthyromance.com, a site dedicated to single wealthy parents and beautiful women. I created an account on that site and wondered whether I am lucky on that site. Fortunately, I happened to see a single mom's profile during my searching. Her photos and profile caught my eyes immediately. I sent her a wink. She winked at me two days later. Everything becomes great after that wink. We decided to meet after tens of back-and-forth emails. We found we are both attractive to each other. Another two months later, we got engaged. Now we are happily married! So I just want to advise single parents can try some online dating sites to add some smiles or a touch of romance to your single life! |
| Posted by stmirren On Wednesday 15 August 2007 Quote |
Vivian Guess you got the wrong person to reply to: Wealthy separated parents.com. Do me a favour please.Nods and winks? I actualy find this quite offensive to ordinary dads trying to make a go against the law and the CSA. br P |
| Posted by april On Saturday 22 March 2008 Quote |
Hi all Whatever difficulties parents-with-care have to endure, at least they have the consolation of being able to live with their kids. It seems as though all focus is on the single mums who have been left by their children's 'useless, deadbeat fathers' who won't contribute and don't seem committed to their kids. Has it ever occurred to these mothers that leaving was the most difficult, but most correct decision the fathers ever had to face? The options are: 1. Staying 'for the sake of the kids' but having to live with the knowledge that the kids are hearing the arguments and are growing up in an unhappy household, or... 2. Leaving the kids with their mother (how can he break that bond?), but knowing that he will be slated as the reason for the breakup and will possibly never have a decent father-child relationship because his child will most likely be taught what a deadbeat he is by their mother. Fathers hate the CSA because they do not believe that a price can be put on time apart from their kids. How dare anyone give a monetary value to the agonising weeks they do not see their children? Fathers feel sick at the thought that their money can be taken and given to their ex-wife (of all people!) as some sort of replacement for their parenting and love? I have no doubt that if the CSA took the same money and put it in a trust fund in the child's name, fathers would rejoice and give as much as they humanly could. When your commitment to your children is measured only by how much money you give to your ex-wife, society is in a very sorry state indeed. And the law regarding contact is an absolute joke. The parent-with-care knows her rights, and knows that she has complete control. How many poor, defenceless single mothers owe their living to maintenance payments? How many poor, defenceless single mothers use their child as a pawn to get to their ex-husband and have him jump through hoops simply to see his beloved son or daughter? Too many. The law does not appear to recognise the difficulties which face non-resident parents, but that is not to say that no-one recognises it. Fathers 4 Justice have worked tirelessly, only to have their name sullied by the media over publicity stunts carried out by desperate fathers. I have counselled a suicidal man on the other side of a bridge about his traumatic experiences with his children and their mother; and now I am a step mother going through first hand the injustices done to non-res fathers and their partners (who get fewer rights than fathers, and that is zilch! But I won't get into that now). I'd love to hear from any non-res parents and their partners who wish to rant, vent, 'constructively criticise', or learn that they are not alone! I'd ultimately like to set up a magazine/forum/meeting ground for us all - so if anyone would like to contribute in any small way it would be great to hear from you. aprilstepmum@yahoo.co.uk |
